If you came of age in the 60's you recognize the song that's playing. That's what I've been thinking about lately as I stand at my kitchen sink looking out my kitchen window--I will be 64 later this year. I don't know when I started showing my age. It seems to have crept up on me. Ten years ago people thought I was 44, not 54.
I think I'm noticing because of all the photos we've been taking of Olivia--I'm in many of them. Here's one my husband took Sunday of me holding her....
About five years ago I started letting my hair grow long. I wanted to be able to wear it in a bun once it turned gray. My hair is the only thing on me that doesn't give my age away. So far I just have streaks of silver. But the rest of me shows it. I've been cutting my hair shorter and shorter over the past few months trying for a more youthful look. So far it hasn't worked.
If you read my last post, you heard about my bear encounter of the close kind a week ago. I've been wondering why the bear was running up my walkway. I've always been curious and looked for meanings behind things, so I decided to check a dream dictionary to see what it would mean if my encounter had been a dream......it felt like one of those dreams you have as you're waking up, when you're not quite lucid yet and you seem to take control of the dream.
So this is what I discovered. Bears are symbolic of the cycle of life. How fitting! Then I looked up other terms like "running" (the bear was coming up the walk in a hurry), "turning" (which the bear did when he saw me), "retracing steps" (the bear headed back the way he came), and "path" (the wooden walkway he followed). Symbolically, the bear represents the last stage of my life. It is approaching fast. The other night I knew something was coming and I was eager to see what it was, so I ran to the door to see. I was expecting to see a deer, but what I saw was a bear (the scary part of growing older). The bear was warned off when I turned on the light and opened the door. It turned and ran back the way it came. That's my attempt to look younger. But, the thing is, the bear is still out there. And as they say about old age, it's better than the alternative.
So my question to you this month is how do you feel about aging? Are you doing anything to help yourself grow gracefully or are you fighting it tooth and nail? (☺that's an inside joke for us oldtimers) If you're just in your 30's, you're excused from this little exercise, because you have no clue....believe me, I had every intention of greeting old age with grace and acceptance, back then.
If you are interested in learning more about the purpose of dreaming check out wikipedia's article on Dreams.
Here is the view out my other window taken earlier today. Everything is green but I'm still waiting for more blossoms....
And to cheer us all up here's another photo of Olivia June looking so fresh from God....
People tell me I don't look my age but I think my hands tell the story. I have sun damaged skin (which I inherited from both parents) so the "age spots" tell all. I also have graying hair but I don't see it when I look in the mirror, only in photos! Funny thing, our perception of ourselves. I like my gray hair,but since it came, I have developed a few annoying cowlicks! There's absolutely nothing we can do about it-- except to accept it with grace.
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DeleteI don't look nearly as old in the mirror as I do in photographs. They say photos add 10 lbs. to you. Maybe they add 10 years, too! I think I just need to stay out of photos and I'll get through this. ☺ My gray hairs seem straighter and not as unruly as my "young" hair. Maybe that will be my compensation. ☺ There are blessings to being older, but as Chris says (see below), it's the transition period that can be daunting.
P.S. Olivia is just adorable!
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DeleteOh, to be 64 again ... **sigh**
ReplyDelete☺Sharon, you're exactly right! I'm sure there will come a day I'll look back and sigh about being only 64! Ha ha ha. I remember being 16 and how I couldn't wait to be older. I could never understand why my mother colored her hair until she was in her 70's and only stopped because she was too ill to do it. Now I do. Maybe once my hair turns gray it'll be easier for the rest of me to look my age. ☺ It's this in between stage I think that is troubling me.
DeleteDear Cathy,
ReplyDeleteI smiled at your post this morning. I will be 65 later this year. Is it possible to age gracefully, while fighting it tooth and nail?! That's how I feel most of the time. I think we all have this mental picture of ourselves and it doesn't age. Then reality looks back in the mirror! Maybe it's best not to even think about it. I don't want to be one of those people in a rocker, on the other hand, I am pretty sure my 5K running days are over. The transition seems to be the hardest part. When we are 80, we will look back and laugh!
Love the pictures of Olivia. She is getting so big!
Chris
Welcome to my Blog, Chris. I do not think we've been introduced (or is it just an old-age memory lapse!?) ☺ You are absolutely right about the mental picture clashing with the reality of the mirror! And your comment about the transition period is on target, too. I think I did this post because I was hoping to find others experiencing what I'm experiencing. Thanks for your comments! ☺ We weighed Olivia on Sunday. She's up to 12 lb-4 oz now and has grown 2 inches.
DeleteCathy,
DeleteWe haven't been formerly introduced....but we are GF's on the Susan Branch Blog. ☺
Chris
I was wondering if that might be the case. Might you be Chris W from TX?
DeleteI am and it is very nice to finally meet you. I have so enjoyed reading your stories about Gabriel and Poetry. I think they are delightful.
DeleteI'm so very glad to meet you, too, Chris! Now I'll be sure to look for you on Susan's blog comments. There have been so many comments on her blog of late that I've not been reading them all like I use to. Thank you for liking my Poetry & Gabriel stories--I'm assuming you're referring to my children's stories? You're the first person to tell me, so your comment is very special to me. ☺♡
DeleteI've posted several photos of my mom, usually in September. She went blond in her 40's when she just couldn't stand to see herself grey. Blond looked good on her! I started to white out pretty young which really bothered mom - she didn't like having a daughter with grey/white hair :)
ReplyDeleteMy daughter suggested I go short and spikey a few years ago. Recently, I was thinking about changing and mentioned it to my very youthful looking, fashionable 70+ girlfriend. She kindly told me to stay with the short and spikey :) It has a way of uplifting my face, if you know what I mean. (LOL)
Decades ago (weird to say that, yes?) Another friend who is just a couple of years younger and is still totally great looking, told me to always dress, do my hair and put on a bit of makeup first thing in the morning. Even if, and maybe most importantly, I was the only one who would see me that day.
I also add earrings - even to garden :)
I'm also adding a bit more sparkly to my accessories since encountering a fashionable older woman in a waiting room. She told me that sparkly made everyone feel good and she was (discretely) doing her part. :)
Of course, none of this matters, if we let our attitudes grow old and dusty. You, my friend, have Olivia June, your family, pets and wonderful gardens to keep a youthful attitude and smile. Don't hide it!
Elaine, I loved all your suggestions! I think we each need to find what keeps us feeling young, because, as you say, the attitude is what makes the difference in the end. Children really do keep you feeling young. My 3rd was a toddler in my early 40's and was just 3 years older than my sister's first grandchild! That went a long way in keeping me feeling young. It's just that it's been a long time coming to become a grandmother. Hopefully, she'll remind me that I'm young at heart at least. ☺
DeleteI never get tired of seeing pictures of Olivia! What a sweetie!
ReplyDeleteAs for getting older (I'm 57), I have to say I quite like most things about this stage of life. I feel like it is "my time." That might sound selfish, but after raising five children and also homeschooling them, I am really enjoying being able to decide how I want my day to go instead of outside influences and people making that choice for me. I loved the years of active parenting, but they were exhausting (we had a high medical needs family).
Kristie, I must I admit I agree with that part--my time is my own! So why does it have to be all or nothing all the time?! ☹ You were an EXTRA full-time Mom it sounds like with the homeschooling and medical needs. You've earned this stage in life! It doesn't sound selfish at all to me. You have a great attitude which will go a long way to soothing the down-side of aging. Plus you already have a grandchild whom I know you greatly enjoy. It really does help. I'm so looking forward to when Olivia and I can actually do things together.
DeleteI'm not fighting the March of Time much at all. I try to eat healthy, stay active, stay well-groomed etc but I would never get plastic surgery or even color my hair. Maybe it's because I was never a pretty girl myself but I truly think people look their best with their own natural looks, whatever that be at the time. I'd rather be myself than be what someone else's idea of Beautiful or Good-Looking is. And I absolutely believe in those "color seasons" and that we should keep the coloring with which we're born. That Nature doesn't make mistakes in our hair, eyes and complexions. People who go the surgery route NEVER really look better than they would with their own features. Just check out one of those "Real Housewives" shows. Yuck - all those women look exactly the same. They all have that funny, stretched skin look and "duck-mouth." Because they've all "had work done" [and many of them are not even that old]. In California it seems to almost be a status symbol. But not one of them looks better than she would have looked without surgery. They just THINK they do. My guess is that many if not most of them will regret it later. Of course they'd never admit out loud, but they will. Brunettes who suddenly become blonde when gray hair starts coming in? Well, I just don't get it. If they want to hide the gray, why aren't they coloring their hair brown? Otherwise they just look like blondes with dark roots. Better to let Nature "color" our hair with gray or silver or white. Overall I guess I just have more respect for people who don't try to fight the inevitable, who can accept what Nature offers with dignity, who don't try to look like a 20-year old for 30 years. Maybe old age is the price we pay for our youth, just as grief is the price we pay for love.
ReplyDeletePS - you're smart to keep your hair shorter, Cathy. I remember my mother telling me when I was in my teens something Coco Chanel said, and it's always stuck with me. Coco believed that only young women looked well in long hair. And by young she meant 30 or less. She thought no woman beyond that age should have hair longer than shoulder-length and as a woman aged, her hair should become shorter. At first I admit I was kind of shocked that Coco set the age at 30 [seemed SO young to me] but since I'm now far past that, I think she was absolutely right. Whenever I see women in person or on TV or in magazines etc, and they're over 30 with long hair, they look like they just walked out of the 60s or 70s to me. And I'm always thinking how much cuter if only they'd cut their hair.
Janet, I had heard the same thing about women over 30 shouldn't wear their hair long. I don't totally agree with that, though. I think it's OK as long as your face still looks 30 ☺. Since that disqualifies me I was wearing it up all the time. I needed the extra length to give it some bulk. I changed my mind, though, when I realized wearing my hair shoulder length would hide a great deal! But in the summer I can't stand to even wear it down that short so I've been thinking of going shorter just to get it off my neck but my husband is already in shock that I've cut as much as I have. I swear--I think when he looks at me he sees the young girl he married. That's good, I guess, but one of these days he's going to really look at me and be in shock! He turned gray and then silver way back in his early 50's so he doesn't seem to mind my few streaks of silver. It's hard to imagine myself with a different hair color--artificial or the eventual gray I'll have. I'm glad it's a gradual thing--not such a shock.
DeleteOh, Cathy! Olivia is a doll! My friend Sharon (commented above) directed me to your blog and am so glad she did! Your kitchen window views are lovely. And, fighting aging "tooth and nail" would make me even more exhausted, so I'm going to age as gracefully as I can and try to enjoy the ride! ~ Donna E. =)
ReplyDeleteP.S. I am letting my hair grow, too! Being able to through it up in a bun or clip will be so much easier than styling this head of ever thinning, sandy white hair of mine! =)
Thank you Donna! I think Olivia is a doll, too, but then I'm her grandmama. ☺ I glad you're enjoying my Blog. I love making new friends. I'm also really enjoying everyone's comments about aging. All the discussion is helping me realize I just need to avoid having my picture taken and I'll be OK. ☺
DeleteCathy, you have touched upon a topic that hopefully will touch us all one day. I agree with most of the thoughts already said in the above comments. I will be 65 this fall and I can hardly believe it. I turned gray in my early forties and hated it--so I started having my hair colored the same dark brown I was born with. I do still have it colored. It makes me feel younger. My dear sister died at the age of 57 with pancreatic cancer. I vowed then that I would never, never complain about growing older. It is not afforded to all and I am thankful every day for good health. Some days I do feel I don't have the energy I once had. On other days energy is not a problem. I'm personally trying to embrace older age with grace and hopefully wisdom.
ReplyDeleteOlivia is just beautiful and looks much older than a two month old child. I know you are having a ball with her! ♥
I'm sorry to hear that your sister died at such a young age. I often think of my best friend who died from ovarian cancer when we were 54. Her first grandchild was just one. It does give you a new perspective on life and what's important as we age. My grandmother lived to be 103, so if I'm concerned about sagging skin now can you imagine what I'll look like at that age! Definitely will stay away from cameras AND mirrors. But seriously, I think you get to a point that you're grateful you're not hurting somewhere and that you have your eyesight and can get around without assistance. My husband's mother lived to be in her early 90's but was very frail because she did not take good care of herself. I walk on the treadmill 2.5 miles a day, so I'm hoping that will keep me mobile until I die.
DeleteUp until recently, I was determined to age as disgracefully as humanly possible! I was often mistaken for someone much younger, in their late 30's early 40's {I'll be 57 this year} My hair is an odge bodge of grey/blonde/dark but I cannot colour it to make me feel and look younger again. My skin, though, is great. Lately, I'm feeling my age. It bothers me a lot that inside I feel young and bright but when I look in the mirror I shudder. Of course, I think we all want to be 25 again but with all the knowledge and life experience that being 50+ brings. I am learning to be comfortable in my own skin through this process and as long as I can keep having fun and discovering new things I'll be okay about it all.
ReplyDeleteOlivia is a precious doll, and I think you will find she will go a long way to helping you keep feeling young again!
Hi Deborah! It really is all about learning to be comfortable in our own skin (such as it is at our age! ☺). I think we women have it tough, though, because of the constant images on TV and magazines. There was a time I wouldn't be caught dead without my mascara. Now I only wear it when I expect to be in a photograph--see it's only the camera that is my nemesis!
DeleteYOU WALK ON THE TREADMILL 25 MILES A DAY?!?!?!? You go, girl!
ReplyDeleteNo, no, no! That's 2-1/2 miles! This font doesn't show the decimal point between the 2 and 5. If I walked 25 miles a day I'd be skin and bones!
DeleteLOL ... I was having trouble computing that data!
ReplyDeleteHello everyone who subscribed to these comments. Someone just posted this on Facebook and I just had to share it here: http://youtu.be/O4QzHeUE-CM ☺
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